Ok Boys and Girls. Hoes and Wholesomes. Lads and Ladettes. It's time to play a little game that we like to call Tat-tle Tales.
We'll select three mind-bottling...you know, when things are so crazy it gets your thoughts all trapped...like in a bottle? (big ups to our hetro hero Will Ferrell for that line!!!) tattoos that are so unfathomable and so inexplicably horrific, that we just HAVE to trash the shit out of them, and then let you pick which tat is the winner.
Just post a comment for the one you think should be burned from their flesh with a hot shank, or that should be immortalized in a Ripley's Belive It Or Not.
Soooooo, let the tat-tle tales begin.
Just post a comment for the one you think should be burned from their flesh with a hot shank, or that should be immortalized in a Ripley's Belive It Or Not.
Soooooo, let the tat-tle tales begin.
First up, we have an elegantly and artistically designed tat, branded across what appears to be a female belly, filled no doubt with Dairy Queen delights and Dunkin Donuts munchkins. Just a quick question for all you folks out there that are fixated on this finery... if that is indeed the front for her stretchy, faux-denim pantaloons, where in all of Kmart brand specials is her fuckin cum container...aka belly button? Discuss amongst yourselves.
Next is a treasure that we unearthed which is far more valuable AND entertaining than watching a dream catcher dance in the wind. It is so mesmerizing you may stare at if for hours, and then question your own self worth because you did not think of this first. It is none other than an Indian gal (with a face that strikingly resembles Gollum from Lord of the Rings) who is straddling a FUCKIN CORN DOG!!!! Don't you just want to just dip whatever body part this is in a vat of corn dog coating and eat up every last morsel? We advise that you print this out and bring it to Christmas dinner as a nice family discussion piece.
And lastly, we bring forth to you a tat that is so disturbing, we're not actually sure if it's the subject matter or the act of someone getting this tattoo that makes us more confused. Mr. Michael Moore has been honored by being permanently etched onto someones fuckin bod. Our guess is that it's Michael Moore himself who got this work done, and if ever there was a chance for him to get the poontang, that ship has sailed and he's surely going to continue to fuck himself.
So tally up folks, and post your comments now. And stay tuned for the next installment of Tat-tle Tales!
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4 Reply to "Tat-tle Tales"
Cc* on December 9, 2008 3:39 PM
I'm voting for the Bitches Is Crazy, belly-button devouring, "why would i even think this pic of my lump is a good idea?" tattoo. That shit is chronic like tribal band tattoos and jelly shoes. Word up.
(although the "My Precious Indian in The Cupboard" tatt was a top notch contender)
Anonymous on December 11, 2008 12:02 PM
Bitches is crazy, She is all Kris Kross, that is her lower back and that zipper is on her crack!
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